I'd rather be beat

This is what Radley used to say about his parents' lectures. And I'm sure this is what my kids will be saying about me when they're grown. But I like to think of my lectures, not as lectures, but more as counsel...I counsel Radley on the benefits of being romantic (which--thanks to his ODD--always has the opposite of the desired effect), I counsel my students on the benefits of taking responsibility for using their "new" speech sounds so I can stop banging my head against the wall after doing 100 initial /r/ word drills, I counsel my kids (Okay, just Aiden, but Ava's not far behind) on why it's not a good idea to tell Mommy "no" (ending up with them landing in jail because he told a policeman "no" all because Mommy let him say "no" to her!) It's a reflex, much like when the doctor taps your knee and you kick. If he tapped my larynx, a lecture--I mean, counsel--would come out. Even as I go on and on and on, I think to myself, "Man, he's surely had enough." But there's always one more point to make, one more important life lesson to impart...And what do I get for my long-winded attempts at enlightening people? A reaction such as, "Uh, can we play now?" or "Don't you have some laundry to do?" Geez! The ingratitude!